Set You Free

author's note: ahhhh, Yunho's heart is broken here....sorry, Yunho shippers!!!!! I am quite angry at myself for making Yunnie sad here.....

and ah, side A. i love side A. too bad i didn't get to see them perform when they came. **runs to punch boss' nose.. smirks... it hurt, right b.itch??**

back to the topic, YUNHO!!!!!



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The world spun out of control as you try to sit up straight on the tall narrow stool by the bar. That's when you knew you were drunk. It was a first since you never drank that much or never get drunk at all on a Wednesday night, but you had every excuse to drown yourself in booze, spirits and wine this Wednesday night. You got your heart broken, although it has stayed broken for a long time, tonight it felt like it has been stomped on by an angry mob, ran over by a 10 wheeler truck and left for dead. Roadkill! You did something outrageously stupid tonight, but you had to do it, so that you could move on and never look back. It was perhaps the hardest thing you've done in all your 24 years on earth. Your lips started to twitch in a sardonic smile. Smiling at your misfortune was all you could do.

"Hyung!! How long have I been here??", you asked the bartender whom you have befriended since your trainee days.

"I don't know, dude. Didn't you open the bar for me today?", he quipped. As a bartender, he has seen all sorts of people seeking refuge in alcohol and nicotine overdose even just for a night, and Jung Yunho was one of them this evening. 'Matters of the heart...', he guessed when you came knocking on the resto bar's then closed gates. He has known the you for a long time, and has taken notice that there were only three reasons for you to come drinking in his bar: success at work, family related troubles and Hwangbo Hyejung-perhaps the only woman you were crazy about.

"Yeah, I did...", you smiled like a mad man. "Thanks, Hyung. I really needed this.. Badly, terribly", you continued mumbling.

"Don't mention it. Just take it easy on the hard drinks, will you?", he reminded you.

"Oh c'mon! Don't be a s.ourpus.s! Hmmmm... Give me a shot.. No, two shots of whiskey!!", you sputtered in your alcohol induced state.

When the other man did not respond to your request, you raised your voice an decibel higher, "Please... Please Hyung before Duck Tales come for me. I know you called them already...", you said referring to the rest of DBSK.

"Ahhh, whatever!", the man said.

You swallowed the bitter liquor without much reaction showing on your face. You look around for traces of people, but there were only a few patrons tonight and you thank God for that. You take in a deep breath filling your lungs with as much oxygen as you can, then exhaled focusing on the small stage where a band was doing last minute sound check. You nodded to acknowledge the man holding the acoustic guitar. He was someone you knew from the area you grew up in. He smiled right back at you.

"Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen", the lead vocalist said over his microphone, "We're Fusion. We hope you enjoy our set tonight."

The band hit the opening notes of the song, and you, once again, drown in your pain.

"Hyung", Changmin whispered behind you.

"Ahhhh, Huey! You finally came! I've been waiting for you. Wait, where's Louie, Dewey and Uncle Scrooge?", you swerved as you tried to face the maknae of the group.

"Louie, Dewey and Uncle Scrooge!!! Don't you know who they are?", you asked completely intoxicated.

Changmin shook his confused head.

"You are Huey, Micky is Dewey, Junsu is Louie, and Jaejoong is Uncle Scrooge, together you are DuckTales", you loudly laughed at your own joke.

Changmin was still confused, but he just scoffed and sat beside you, "They are coming, I live near here, so I got here first. Anyway, so, you said goodbye to Noona?"

"Yip!", you answered almost immediately, then gulped another big portion of your 6th bottle of beer.

"What did she say?", he continued asking taking the dark brown bottle from your hand.

"I don't know", you answered bluntly after signaling the bartender for another one. "She was asleep."

"Oh." was all the maknae could say.

You did not want to remember, but the memories came banging on the steel gates of your brain.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
You painfully recalled the moment you vowed to yourself that you would never allow her to cry nor get hurt again as long as you were alive.

It was a beautiful spring day when it happened. You were driving your new sleek Porsche 911 turbo when you passed a familiar face on the street. Her face was distraught and her eyeliner and mascara were smudged around her eyes proof enough that she has been crying. You stop the car because your heart knew who it was.

She did not even notice the flashy car infront of her, she was too caught up in her own troubles to notice, and so you roll down the heavily tinted window.

"Noona!", you called out, but she did not seem to hear.

You went out of the car and called her again. This time she looked at you, and tears started to flooding down her cheeks, then she flung her arms around your neck, and cried in your arms without saying a word. The both of you stayed that way for a couple of minutes. In those very brief minutes, you felt your heart being crushed. You felt her pain and you did not even know the reason for her tears. You knew you should have pushed her away, but how can you push away Hwangbo Hyejung-the woman you'll always love maybe even until the next life. She was dangerously too close, too close that you can hear the rapid thudding of her heart. You close your eyes and hug her tighter trying to comfort her, and in a way, trying to ease your pained heart at the sight of her devastation.

It was not until she was inside your car that she finally spoke.

"I broke up with him", she said in between muffled sobs.

"Hyunjoong?", you found the courage to say the name of the b.astard who stole her away and the cause of her present misery.

She nodded unable to look at you.

"Why?", you asked staring blankly at the steering wheel as you grip it tighter bracing yourself for her answer.

"Because..."she muffled more sobs, "Because it's getting harder for him. He's at his peak, and he can do more, but I'm tying him down."

You stayed quiet for a moment, looking for something to punch as you saw the pain in her eyes through her reflection.

"And he let you go?", you asked, emotionless.

"I walked away from him, Yunnie", she answered, calling you like that as she always did in private.

You gritted your teeth. It hurt that she was calling you Yunnie because it only meant that she'll forever see you as her dongsaeng.

"Well, he's an a.sshol.e for letting you walk away, Noona.", you whispered.

A small smile twitched on her lips as she wiped her tears, "I don't know why Yunnie, but I always seem to bump into you when I get my heart broken, remember the last time?"

And, how could you forget? That was way back your debut days, but you still remember how painful it was to see her crying in the dressing room after her eight year relationship ended. You nodded in response.

Her smile widened as she turned to you after wiping her tears, "Well, thank you so much, Yunnie. You've always been a dear friend". She started opening the door, but you grab her arm on impulse.

"No, don't go. Let's do something fun to make you forget. Alright, Noona?", before she could answer, you sped off and drove away.

A rebound relationship is one that occurs shortly after the break-up of a significant love relationship - something you promised you'll never be in, but that is exactly what you are getting yourself into now. A rebound relationship, no matter how hard it may be, is something you wish for now because desperate times call for desperate measures, and you promised yourself that you will protect her and her battered heart.

A week flew by quickly, and you've become closer to Hyejung, and unknowingly falling harder for her, too. She was able to laugh again now, and it was all because of you. Now, more than ever, you were determined to pursue her even if you knew she was not in love with you. Not yet, you hoped.

You put off a week's work to be with her. All you wanted was to make sure a sad tear will never escape her lovely eyes. Changmin, despite his young age, strongly warned you about this and the effects if it does not work out. Junsu was not too happy, either. Jaejoong hated the idea, but he tried being neutral because Hyunjoong was his friend, too. Micky, being another Hyejung admirer, thought it was stupid for Hyunjoong to let her walk out, but they were friends, too, just like you were his friend, so he stayed out of it.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Hyung, I hate to say this, but---", Changmin started

You finish it for him, "You told me so.. Yeah, yeah. Can't you just be a good friend and wallow in my pain with me? Besides, you're too young to be a Love Guru.", you joked, but Changmin was not smiling. He was worried about you because he has never seen you like this.

Junsu arrived, and you just greeted him with your drunken smile. He was no mind reader, but he understood the reason why there were 7 empty bottles infront of you as you drained another one. He knew of your plan to give up, and he expected this to happen, but not this soon.

The three of you sat in silence pretending to listen to the band until Junsu cleared his throat and spoke, "Did you tell her you love her?"

You laughed then shook your head.

"You went that far, but you did not tell her? You're a greater fool than I thought you are. Maybe even a greater fool than Hyunjoong", Junsu said, obviously frustrated at you.

You drowned another drink before speaking, "Well, at least the other great fool is probably wrapping his arms tightly around the woman of our dreams at this very moment"

You laughed at your misery.

"Huh, what do you mean?", Changmin asked breaking his long silence.

"I called Hyunjoong before leaving Noona in Pusan. I told him where she was.", you smiled bitterly

"You did what?", Changmin gasped.

"You heard me right, Huey.", you answered

"But why?!"

This was something you could not bring yourself to admit, but you had too. "Because she is still inlove with him. She loves him so much that even I can feel it. She loves him and that hurts me more than I ever thought it would because it means there is no place left in her heart for me. NONE FOR ME..."

Changmin and Junsu could see the pain in your eyes. Junsu put his hand on your shoulder as if saying it's going to be alright. There were things and words between friends that need not be said.

"I want her to be happy. I want her to smile without seeing the shadow and pain in her eyes, and there is only one person who could bring her such joy.", you closed her eyes.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

There were moments when Hyejung zoned out and you knew she was stuck in his 4D world. You can see it in her eyes, in the smile she fakes. You can see it when her fingers linger on his things he left inside her apartment. Although, she does not say it, you know she is still waiting for the day they might be together again, but you held on to her and to the foolish hope that she'll see you as the Yunho who loves her probably more than Hyunjoong ever will.

You walked on the beach with her one day, and you bravely asked her a question to appease the loud protests in your heart. "Noona, do you still love him? Hyunjoong?"

Her answer would determine the next route that you will take. Fight or flight. You were ready to fight, but her answer was screaming, flight, even if she does not say a word. She looked deep in your eyes that afternoon, and the silent tears she shed was her answer. And so, you flight.

You give her a smile to drown the loud shrilling sound of your heart breaking, "Can I hug you, Noona?" 'For the last time?', you added in your thoughts.

When she nodded, you took her in your warm embrace. And try to take note of how her hair smelled, her sweet softness, her fragile frame, you take notice of everything about her one last time.

She fell asleep on your shoulder that evening. The miserable overly exhausted Hyejung slept like an angel.

You cussed at yourself and at fate’s cruelty. Perhaps, if you were chosen to be her fake husband on the show, you would’ve been given a chance to show her your love. But, it’s too late now. Someone owns her heart, and you could only wish for that someone to take better care of her and love her as much as you do.

You gently touched her cheek. "Loving you is all that means to me, but I want you to be happy. Your happiness is all I wish for. Loving you must mean, I really have to set you free from my heart.", you told her silently. You brushed your lips lightly on her forehead-your first and last kiss, "Be happy, Noona."

With that, you fled the atrocious scene knowing her happiness is on the way to take her back.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The pain that washed your whole being finally woke you up from your drunken stupor.

"It'll be fine, dude", a gruff voice said from behind the trio. It was Jaejoong.

"You came this far, you can make it a mile or two further. You've been through a lot Leadersshi, this is something you can overcome. We're still behind you." Micky added as the three of you looked behind them.

"I know this has been said a million times before, but maybe, it was not meant to be. Perhaps, you'll find someone else~~who knows?!", Jaejoong added.

You scoffed, "Maybe..."

You looked at the wall where Polariod pictures of celebrities were pasted and saw one of hers, 'I can set you free, Hwangbo Hyejung.', you quietly urged yourself, 'My heart can set you free........'